The Evils of Backbiting

Allah, to whom all praise and glory is due, says:

Do not spy nor backbite about some of you to others. Would any of you like to eat the flesh of a dead Muslim? No, you would despise that. Fear Allah. Surely Allah is the one who accepts repentance, the most Merciful.

And Muhammad (peace be upon him) said in his last sermon:

Verily, your blood, your property, and your honor are as sacred and inviolable as the sanctity of this day of yours, in this month of yours, and in this town of yours.

Allah has given many blessings to his servants. Amongst these blessings is the blessing of speaking with the tongue. If we use this blessing of Allah to our benefit (praying, reciting Qur'an, remembering Allah), we will enter Paradise, insh'Allah. But if we use this blessing of Allah for hurtful things, we will qualify to enter the Hellfire (Allah forbid).

The tongue is the most important organ in the body. When the tongue is truthful, the heart and the rest of the body stay correct. When the tongue is corrupt, the heart and the rest of the body are corrupted.

Allah says:

Not a word does one utter but there is a watcher by it ready (to record).

And Muhammad (pbuh) said:

A Muslim is one from whose tongue and hands, the other Muslims are in peace.

Muhammad (pbuh) defined backbiting for us. According to Abu Hurairah, Muhammad (pbuh) said, "Do you comprehend what backbiting is?" The people said, "Allah and His messenger know best." He (pbuh) said, "Talking about your brother what he would abhor." Someone asked, "What if my brother has what I describe?" He (pbuh) said, "If your brother is the way you describe, you did backbiting on him. And if he is not like that, you slandered him." This hadeeth tells Muslims not to describe their brothers and sisters in Islam with words she would despise or dislike, even though those words may well be true. It is recommended to describe other Muslims in good words or remain silent. To describe them in repulsive terms is not permitted, because doing so amounts to either backbiting or slander, and these are not the attributes of a Muslim.

Note: Many Americans confuse backbiting with gossip, but these two things are different. Backbiting is making fun of another person behind their back. Gossip is talking about another person (true or false) with the intent to defame them. Both of these actions are forbidden in Islam.

Uqbah ibn Amir narrated: "I asked Muhammad (pbuh) 'what is the way to safety?' He (pbuh) said, 'Guard your tongue, stay in your house, and cry over your sins'." I advise you and myself to save our tongues from the evils of backbiting. Most people do not consider backbiting as a big sin, but in reality it is a huge sin, because it leads a person to Hellfire (Allah forbid). Muaz ibn Jabal asked, "Will we be held accountable for what we say?" Muhammad (pbuh) said, "What's the matter with you?! People will be thrown into the Hellfire on their faces because of words uttered from their tongues!"

Why do people backbite?

One of the reasons that prompts a person to backbite is envy. A person speaks ill of his brother in Islam on account of envy for his wealth, or his kids, or his position. Both envy and backbiting are forbidden.Ibn Abd Al-Bar said, "By Allah! People cross all limits in backbiting and slander, and this is because of ignorance and envy."

Another reason that prompts a person to backbite is weakness of faith in Allah, and weakness in fear of Allah. A strong believer does not backbite anyone, because he knows that Allah will hold him accountable for his deeds. A believer controls his ego (nafs).

Another reason that prompts people to backbite is involving themselves in vain talk, mocking, and joking. It is not permitted for a Muslim or Muslimah to continue to sit in a setting where people talk ill of other people behind their backs, because Allah describes it as an attribute of the people of Hellfire:

we used to speak idle-talk with vain talkers.

Qatadah said about this verse, "It means, whenever idle-talkers talked falsehood, we joined them."

If a person attends a gathering, where people are backbiting others, if he or she doesn't admonish them, then he or she should leave the gathering. The one who does not do this will be among the sinners. Ibn Abd Al-Bar said, "A group of scholars disliked idle talk and joking because it leads to a bad end (Hellfire), and talks about honor of other people."

If people were to know the consequences of backbiting they would surely abstain from it. Backbiting has several negatives in this world and the hereafter. The person who backbites has his sins exposed in this world and in the Hereafter. Ibn Umar narrated, "Muhammad (pbuh) climbed on to the podium and proclaimed: 'O you who say you believe with your tongues but the faith does not enter your hearts! Do not torture the believers, nor slander them, nor prod into their cover. He who prods into the cover of his Muslim brother, Allah will prod into his cover, and whomever Allah prods into his cover will be exposed, even though he is in the security of his house." Saif ur Rahman Mubarakpuri explains, "The saying 'Allah will prod into his cover' means Allah will expose all his shortcomings even though he hides it from the people inside his house."

Those who backbite will be punished in their graves. Qatadah said, "Punishment of the grave is on three accounts: one third from backbiting, one third from slandering, and one third from urine (that soils the clothes)."

I advise those who are used to speaking ill of people behind their backs to repent and ask Allah's forgiveness, because it is forbidden to do so. One hadith tells us that Aisha, one of the wives of Muhammad (pbuh), spoke ill about Safiyyah, another wife of Muhammad (pbuh), in her absence. Muhammad (pbuh) admonished Aisha by telling her that the sin of a single bad word is enough to pollute the water of an ocean. This hadith applies to a great number of people, especially but not exclusively women, who think it is normal to tell about the shortcomings of other women and to tell other people about their mistakes. This is forbidden.

There are, however, circumstances in which it is permitted to speak ill of another person in his or her absence. These are:

1) If you are wronged, you can complain to the judge or the authorities and describe to him or her the circumstances in order to claim your right.

2) If you want to warn someone from the mischief of another person. If you know about a person who does bad things and you tell other Muslims only because you want them to take caution concerning the mischief maker, it is not considered backbiting.

3) If a person seeks your opinion about another person in regards to marriage, and you know the person well, you should appraise the inquirer about this person's characteristics (good and bad), and this is not backbiting.

Dear brothers and sisters, if we were to reflect upon ourselves, each one of us would discover many faults that we possess. Why should we indulge ourselves in talking about other people's faults, while forgetting or ignoring our own? It is not the attribute of a believer to vilify a person by saying words that expose the shortcomings of our fellow Muslims, even if they are true.

And Allah knows best.

The dangers of lying

Allah, to whom all praise and glory is due, said:

Not a word does one utter but there is a watcher by it ready (to record).

 And Muhammad (peace be upon him) said:

Truth leads to piety, and piety leads to paradise. A man persists in speaking the truth until he is recorded with Allah as a truthful person. Falsehood leads to transgression, and transgression leads to Hellfire. A man continues to lie until he is recorded with Allah as a liar.

Lying is to speak opposite of reality or opposite of truth, and this is forbidden by Allah and His messenger (pbuh). It is narrated that Muhammad (pbuh) was asked, "Can a believer be a coward?" Muhammad (pbuh) answered, "Yes." He was further asked, "Can a believer be stingy?" He (pbuh) answered, "Yes." He was then asked, "Can a believer be a liar?" He (pbuh) responded, "No."

Thus, Muhammad (pbuh) ruled that though a believer may be a coward or stingy due to weakness in faith, he cannot be a liar, as lying is not a characteristic of the believers.

Allah, to whom all praise and glory is due, said:

Surely, Allah does not guide the one who is a transgressor, a liar!

And Allah, to whom all praise and glory is due, said:

It is only those who believe not in the verses of Allah who fabricate falsehood, and it is they who are liars.

Zain al-Abideen Ali bin Hussan (may Allah be pleased with him) said to his children, "Beware of lies, whether small or big, in serious talk and in jokes, because the one who lies in small things also lies in big things. Know it that the messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) said, 'A man persists in speaking the truth until he is recorded with Allah as a truthful person. A man continues to lie until he is recorded with Allah as a liar.'"

Lying is a terrible thing that has several manifestations. Among these are false oaths, false testimony, breaking promises, and lying for entertainment.

False Oath

When a man gives a false oath by swearing about something that he knows to be false, this is the biggest of all lies. Muhammad (pbuh) said, "Beware of the false oath, as it causes destruction of a house with its inhabitants."

We often observe traders and merchants taking false oaths to describe their merchandise to be good when in fact it is not. This false oath is called in Arabic as the Oath of Ghamoos and it pushes a person toward hellfire. One who makes a false of should repent and never return to lying.

Abdullah ibn Umer ibn Al-Aas, may Allah be pleased with him, narrated that a Bedouin came to Muhammad (pbuh) and said, "Oh Messenger of Allah! Which sins are the cardinal sins?" Muhammad (pbuh) said, "To associate partners with Allah." The Bedouin said, "Then which one?" He (pbuh) said, "al-yameen al-ghamoos". Abdullah asked, "What is al-yameen al-ghamoos?" Muhammad (pbuh) answered, "Swearing falsely to usurp the property of a Muslim."

Abu Umama Al-Harithi narrated that Muhammad (pbuh) said, "He who usurped the right of a Muslim through false oath, Allah will surely put him into Fire, and will forbid him Paradise." A man said, "Even for a small thing, O Messenger of Allah?" Muhammad (pbuh) said, "Even for a piece of Miswak (a small stick used to clean the teeth)!"

False testimony

False testimony is a grave thing as it results in freeing the oppressor and punishing the oppressed, and destroys Muslim unity. That is why Allah commanded:

Shun false statements.

 Abu Bakhra (may Allah be pleased with him) narrated that Muhammad (pbuh) said, "'Shouldn't I inform you of the biggest of cardinal sins?' We said, 'Yes, O Messenger of Allah!' He (pbuh) said, 'Associating partners with Allah and disobedience to the parents.' He was reclining and then he sat up and said, 'Beware of false statements.' And he (pbuh) kept on repeating this until we wished he would stop."

Allah and His messenger (pbuh) have forbidden false oath and false testimony as these are harmful for Muslims both in this world and the Hereafter. The one who indulges in false oath and false testimony invites the wrath of Allah in this world and the Hereafter. And a similar fate is due to the one who assists someone in false oath or false testimony. Allah said:

Help one another in righteousness and piety, and do not help one another in sin and transgression.

Breaking Promises and Lying for Entertainment

Keeping a promise is one of the characteristics of a believer, and breaking the promise is the characteristic of the hypocrite. Allah told us about Ishmael (pbuh):

Mention in the Book about Ishmael. Surely! He was true in his promise, and he was a messenger, and a prophet.

Some scholars said that Ishmael (pbuh) promised a person for something and then waited for him for one year but the person did not return.

When a person makes a promise he should fulfill it. Unfortunately, some Muslims break their promises and thus cause a breaking of Muslim unity. We as an ummah need to refrain from such behavior as it is forbidden (haraam).

Lying for entertainment means to forge a lie to make other people laugh. This is forbidden. Muhammad (pbuh) said, "Woe to him who utters a falsehood to make people laugh. Woe to him. Again, woe to him."

Every single category of lying is harmful and dangerous. One of the ways lying harms us is that a liar is not trusted by people. Even if he tells the truth, people will assume it is a lie. Another way lies harm is that it weakens Muslim unity. A truthful person is honored and respected by people, and this helps strengthen Muslim unity.

What Causes a Person to Lie?

One of the causes that prompts a person to lie is habit. A person may tell lies out of habit, e.g. he or she is a habitual liar. Another cause is greed. A person who is greedy and not content with what Allah provides for him or her is prone to lying. Another cause is enmity and envy. A person who has envy or enmity for other people is vulnerable to telling lies.

How Do We Stop Lying?

We should strive to speak the truth and shun lying, as this is one way to end lying. Muhammad (pbuh) said, "Knowledge comes by learning, and tolerance comes by practice, and he who seeks good is given that." So, when a Muslim tries to practice patience, Allah gives the Muslim patience. And when a Muslim tries to practice tolerance, Allah gives the Muslim toleranc. And when a Muslim tries to give up lying, telling the truth will be easy for the Muslim.

Another way to stop lying is to listen to the stories of the Companions and their followers. Truthfulness was among the characteristics that they had learned from Muhammad (pbuh), who was called As-Sadiq, Al-Amin (the truthful, the trust worthy); he (pbuh) neither lied, nor broke trust.

Remember that Allah, to whom all praise and glory is due, said:

O you who believe! Be conscious of Allah, and be with those who are truthful.

And Allah knows best.

Virtues of Forgiveness

Allah, to whom all praise and glory is due, said to Muhammad (peace be upon him):

Show forgiveness, enjoin what is good, and turn away from the foolish (meaning, don't punish them).

And Allah says:

 So forgive and overlook, until Allah brings His command. Surely, Allah has power over all things.

Anas narrated that Muhammad (pbuh) said, "When the Day of Judgment will be established, a caller will say, 'the one whose reward is due on Allah should enter Paradise.' Then it will be announced, 'where are those whose reward is due on Allah?' So a group of people, who used to forgive others, will stand up and enter Paradise without reckoning.

Remember, this life is temporary.

The attribute of forgiveness is important, which is why Allah commanded Muhammad (pbuh) to 'show forgiveness, enjoin what is good, and turn away from the foolish."

Muhammad (pbuh) asked the angel Gabriel (pbuh), "What is forgiveness?" Gabriel (pbuh) replied, "To join the one who severed you, to give to the one who denied you, and to pardon the one who oppressed you." At-Tabri explained: "This means to adopt the attribute of forgiveness over all the other attributes of people, to overlook their wrong doings directed at you, and to turn away from the foolish ones with peace."

Some people incorrectly assume that forgiveness is a sign of weakness and cowardice. Rather, forgiveness is a sign of strength and an attribute of the brave, because the one who forgives has control over his ego (nafs) and his desires.

Jafar As-Sadiq said, "I prefer to err on the side of pardon ten times, than to err on the side of punishment once." This means that it is better to forgive someone by mistake than it is to punish someone by mistake.

Forgiveness brings us together

Furthermore, forgiveness has great importance in Islam. Imam ibn Qayyim declared, 'Oh child of Adam! Between you and Allah are mistakes and sins that only Allah knows. You desire Allah to forgive you, so forgive Allah's servants and Allah will forgive your mistakes, because if you forgive in the world, Allah will forgive you in the Hereafter."

Ali ibn Abi Talib narrated that Muhammad (pbuh) said, "Shouldn't I tell you about the most superior verses in the book of Allah? It is the saying of Allah: 'Whatever misfortune befalls you, it is because of what your hands have earned. Allah pardons from much (of your misdeeds)." I will explain it to you, Oh Ali. What reaches you from sickness, hardship, or trial in this world is because of your actions. So Allah will not return the punishment in the Hereafter, and what Allah forgives in this world, Allah will not punish for what he has already forgiven."

Allah has praised the righteous people and promised them paradise, as spacious as the heavens and the Earth, because of their following attributes: giving charity in prosperity and times of hardship, holding back anger, forgiving people, and excellent morals.

If someone oppresses us or holds back what is rightfully ours, and we forgive him or her, Allah will accept our forgiveness and enter us into paradise. As previously mentioned, forgiveness does not mean weakness and cowardice, rather it means to forgive when you have the power to take retribution, and still forgive for the sake of Allah. Ibrahim an-Nakhi said, "the companions of Muhammad (pbuh) disliked to be humiliated, but when they had power, they forgave."

Do you need to forgive someone?

Taking revenge from the oppressor is a right, but forgiveness is superior. Allah says, "The recompense of an injury is an injury like thereof; but whoever forgives and makes reconciliation, they shall be rewarded by Allah. Surely, Allah does not like the wrong-doers."

Let each one of us forgive when wronged by another, as Muhammad (pbuh) did after he conquered Mecca. The people of Mecca had plotted to kill him, tortured his companions, fought against him in Badar and Uhad, and brought many allies against him in the Battle of the Trench. When the Meccans were defeated and forced to lay down their arms, the Muslims were waiting word from Muhammad (pbuh) to punish the Meccans. Muhammad (pbuh) asked, "O you people of Mecca! How do you imagine I am going to deal with you?"

The Meccans said, "You are a kind person and the son of a kind person."

Muhammad (pbuh) said, "Go, you are free." And he (pbuh) forgave them.

Allah reminds us that "the good deed and the evil deed are not equal. Repel (evil) with the one which is better. Then surely, one with whom you had enmity will become your close friend. But none will be granted (this quality) except those who are patient, and none will be granted it except those who own the greatest portion (of high morals)."

And Allah knows best.